My legacy

Satre said that a man doesn't begin to live until he truly recognizes his own mortality. I'm thinking that advice should not apply to a younger man or woman. Much of the enjoyment of life is in making mistakes. You do want to avoid making the ones that may put you into hospitals, correctional institutions or the morgue but you don't as a young person want to live your live so deliberate and calculated that you will not experience the joy of doing things successfully that are also risky. No, the advice is better suited to people like me who are further down in the life expectancy tables and who should be cognizant every day that time is running out. I have surgery on Wednesday where I will get general anesthesia and I have been thinking about the risk that comes with that. I fear death less than dying, that something should go wrong during my procedure I that it will leave me in a comatose state and a burden to my family. I only fear in death that I leave little in material things (meaning money or property) for my family, especially my son. That he, unemployed and still trying to get purchase in his personal and private life will be left adrift with my passing. At this stage of my life, how can I change that?